All Cried Out…

May my cry come before you, O LORD; give me understanding according to your word.  Psalm 119:169

(image source – unknown)

Many of you, I’m sure, have seen the recent news.  Some of you may have seen it and are now doing all you can to avoid it.

I can’t avoid it.

My heart aches for 27 families who now mourn the loss of a loved one.  I can’t imagine the immense pain and heartache they and many others are now burdened with.

Yesterday, lives were changed forever because of one young mans choice.

I feel drawn to these stories, learning what I can about the precious little angels who didn’t get hugs from their parents.  I want to know them, see how much they were loved, cherish their memories.  I want to comfort their families, tell them it will all be okay and yet…

I’m here.

In times like this, I’m almost at a loss for words.

How do you tell someone it will get better?
How do you tell them that time will heal their wounds?
How do you tell them God is with them when in this moment, they feel anger, betrayal and hurt?
How do you tell them their babies are no longer suffering when they are left with horrid images and tragedy?
How do you comfort the siblings?
How does a parent tell their other children their sibling isn’t coming home?
How does a man move on with his life when he’s tormented by the acts of his brother?
How does a father live, knowing the acts of his son have left a community destroyed?

The only thing I know to do is …


I know some will just think that is ridiculous and I’m sad to know there are people who think that.  In moments when life is unbearable, prayer is the one comfort I have found to be consistent. It’s the quiet moments when I can take my questions to God and rest in my faith that someday, we’ll understand, which keep me going.

And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.  Ephesians 6:18

Today, as I wrapped Christmas gifts for my loved ones, I saw just how insignificant this “stuff” is.  My heart aches for the moms and dads who will not be able to bear removing the unopened gifts from under their trees, for the hugs they will no longer have, for the precious moments that were ripped away from their lives yesterday.  Christmas is not about all this “stuff” … it’s about a love great than we can imagine, the love a parent has for their child, the celebration of birth and life.

I don’t understand the silly, petty things we do and say when so many people are hurting.  I can’t imagine what these parents are going through but from what I have seen, they are some of the most amazing and strong people.  The town has pulled together to rally around these families, and yet, nothing – nothing can bring back their babies, siblings, mothers.

I am all cried out.  I have shed many tears and I have cried out to God with my why’s.  And still, I’m here, waiting, knowing the answers aren’t mine to know … not yet.

I find peace believing that these precious, beautiful children are sitting next to their teachers, Rachel, Lauren, Victoria, Anne Marie, their principal (protector), Dawn, their counselor (comforter), Mary,  and Nancy Lanza – at the feet of Jesus.  I feel sure he’s reading them a story of peace, hope and love and embracing their smiles, the innocent glimmer in their eyes, their hopes and dreams and wrapping his arms around them.

My thoughts and prayers go out to all the families involved, the people of Newtown, Connecticut and our country as we all mourn this senseless act of violence.  I’m putting their names here because I want to remember them, I need to pray for them and I know they need our prayers.  Please join me in praying peace and comfort over these families and all those forever affected by this tragedy.

Prayers specifically for …

Charlotte Bacon, 6
Daniel Barden, 7
Rachel Davino, 29
Olivia Engel, 6
Josephine Gay, 7
Ana M Marquez-Greene, 6
Dylan Hockley, 6
Dawn Hocksprung, 47
Madeline F. Hsu, 6
Catherine V. Hubbard, 6
Chase Kowalski, 7
Jesse Lewis, 6
James Mattioli, 6
Grace McDonnell, 7
Anne Marie Murphy, 52
Emilie Parker, 6
Jack Pinto, 6
Noah Pozner, 6
Caroline Previdi, 6
Jessica Rekos, 6
Avielle Richman, 6
Lauren Russeau, 30*
Mary Sherlach, 56
Victoria Soto, 27
Benjamin Wheeler, 6
Allison N Wyatt, 6

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.  Psalm 34:18

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