Category Archives: Lysa Terkeurst

A Day Out…

This past weekend, I had the privilege of  meeting author Lysa TerKeurst.  You may have heard her mentioned on here.  She is the founder of Proverbs 31 Ministries as well as the author of a number of books, one being, Unglued, which I did the online Bible study for back in the fall.

An invitation was extended to about 50 women from all over the country to attend a luncheon with Lysa and other Proverbs 31 ladies.  It was an honor to be one of the ladies invited to join in on this special time.  Lysa discussed some things from Unglued, we played games, chatted and got to know each other.  I met many beautiful ladies, some from nearby areas of North and South Carolina and some from as far away as Texas, New Jersey and Ohio.  I am pretty sure we all walked away overjoyed and blessed.

There were so many wonderful ladies who helped to make this past weekend special for each of us.  Please keep them in your thoughts and prayers so that they in turn will feel the joy and blessings that we all felt.  

While there, Lysa told us some stories about how she handles certain situations, tough topics with her kids, and other things.  She shared some valuable tips that I am sure I will be using in the future.  I have read most of her books and the one thing I have loved most about her books is how open, honest and real she seems.  Well, I can say, after meeting her in person, she is so real.  She’s not afraid to admit she is human and has faults.  I think that shows her real strength. 

One thing I learned while there is just how much of an introvert I am.  Here I was in Charlotte, NC.  I was around a ton of sweet ladies who were all chatting it up, getting to know each other and I had every opportunity to do the same.  No one knew me and most of them would probably never see me again.  I could talk and converse and walk away without any worries but nooooo, I barely spoke! 

It wasn’t that I wasn’t enjoying myself – quite the opposite, I was very much enjoying myself.  I just can’t seem to find that comfortable place where I can just jump out of my shell and talk.  What do I say?  I don’t even know where to start.

Compared to the hubby, I’m a top rate extrovert but compared to other women, I’ll take a dark, quiet corner in the back any day!  Thankfully, a few ladies who were not so shy managed to invite me to sit at their table with them at lunch (thanks girls!), otherwise, I’d have been chewing on my own.

The difficult reality of all that is considering I feel like God is leading me to write and speak, I feel extremely inadequate for the whole speaking idea.  I sure hope God has a box of courage and confidence tucked away for me!

At the end of the luncheon, we had the opportunity to leave a video message for Proverbs 31.  Now, I just told you about the whole really quiet, dark corner, introvert girl, right?  Well, how about being blasted with bright lights, a camera guy and a gal asking questions … shew, no pressure, right?

One of the questions I was asked, was “How has Proverbs 31 Ministries impacted your life?”

I didn’t even have to think to answer.  My kids mean the world to me.  I have never been what I would consider a great mom but God blessed me with these little people who continue to love me and trust me day in and day out, even when Monster Mom makes an appearance, even when I’m wrong, even when I come unglued…they still come running to me to kiss their boo-boo’s.  They still come to me for goodnight hugs and kisses.  They still come to me for mommy snuggles.

My answer was that Proverbs 31 has impacted me, through Bible studies, through being real and honesty, with encouragement.  The women of Proverbs 31 have taken time to invest in me, in the hopes that I can grow closer to God and that my relationship with Christ will change my life.  It has changed my life and in doing so, it’s making changes in the lives of my children, which means more to me than anything.  Instead of continuing down the road of a not so great mom, I am becoming the mom they need.  I am learning to be a better mom.  I am learning new things every day that make changes in my ways and my attitude and those changes are visible to my kids. 

How can you thank someone for that?  There are not enough words to say thank you for the blessings the beautiful women of Proverbs 31 Ministries have given to me and my family.

© The Imperfect Princess at theimperfectprincess.com

Ch-ch-ch-changes…

Now that I have you humming that little tune in your head (and if you’re not, click here and you will be!)…

Change.

Not the twenty-five cent kind of change.

Real change.

Different things.  Different life.  Different schedule.  Different routine.

And so on.

Change.

I’m sure I’ve probably written about this before but the past few weeks/months have brought on a lot of changes for me in many different areas of my life.

I am not a fan of change.

When I get comfy, I like to stay there.

Back in the fall, when I was going through Melissa Taylor’s online Bible study for Unglued, by Lysa TerKeurst, I came unglued. 

Our van of 4+ years had died.  We went out and bought a new van.  In the end, I have everything to be thankful for, nothing to be ungrateful about and yet I’m human and still fall short.  The point of that is, with a new van, came a monthly car payment which meant I somehow needed extra income which came with the idea of keeping a child which leads us to a handsome little man staying with me during the day, five days a week, which means change.

One little event, the death of an automobile, led to a complete change in my life.  I was comfortable.  Olivia and I had a routine.  I was perfectly content with my eleven year old van.  I didn’t need a new one.  I was happy spending day in and day out shopping with my toddler, going wherever the wind took us, lunch dates with friends, etc.

Now, my time is precious.  I have come to realize that all the time we spent doing nothing, was precious time.  Those are moments I will cherish forever because those are the days Olivia and I shared, just the two of us.

Now, don’t get my wrong … this new little guy, he’s great!  Not only is he a super snugglie three month old, but he’s cute to boot.  And to top it off, his mom and dad are pretty cool too.  So, we have this all worked out and I’m sure this is all part of God’s grander plan but my dislike of change has sure stirred up the emotions.

Yesterday, we took this fancy schmancy new van to the dealership to see if some awkward things could be fixed.  The answer was simply ,”No,” which of course led to me whining and ranting over what idiot designed such and such and did they test it before they … blah, blah and then it hit me …

*SMACK*

“Who’s the idiot here?  You’re griping and complaining about a van that YOU picked out, that YOU decided to buy, that YOU thought would be great and that YOU failed to sit in the third row and see how comfy the very badly designed headrests felt.”

Duh, I, amidst the thoughts of anger, frustration, whining and complaining, came to the stark conclusion that I was the idiot.  I have no right to complain.  Who am I to complain?  I have a nice, new van and here I am complaining about it.  I bet my friend Christy, that gave up everything to move to Africa, would be sorely disappointed in my shallow behavior.

So, I realize now that change isn’t always bad.  Sure, my life has changed but along with it, some really great things have happened.  Change has led me to a whole new world of ladies, some from my very own church that until now, I haven’t had the opportunity to get to know.  A large group of us even went to see Anne Graham Lotz together and what an amazing time that was.  I was also invited to a lovely Valentine’s breakfast at a sweet friends home with a wonderful group of ladies and I had another invite to a dear friends church for a great evening of fun, fellowship and food.

And this little guy that has become a part of mine and Olivia’s day, well, I have really enjoyed getting to know him and his family.

I can’t tell you how many good things have come with change and perhaps that is because sometimes, we tend to focus on the bad.  I let the bad things outweigh the good when in fact, if I take the time to stop and look, the good things far outweigh the bad.

How do you handle change?  Does it get the best of you or do you roll with it and seek out the blessings that come from it?

James 1:17 says …

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

For today, I am going to embrace the changes that come my way, finding the joy, the beauty in the changes and I find comfort and peace in knowing that our God is never changing. He is the same today, tomorrow and always.  His promises have withstood time.  His plans for me and for you are always the same.  What more could I ask for?!

© The Imperfect Princess at theimperfectprincess.com

All Glued Together

This week in the Melissa Taylor’s Online Bible Study on the book, Unglued, by Lysa Terkheurst, we were asked the question …

“How are you applying the Unglued messages in your life personally and bringing God’s Word alive in your life?”

Humpty Dumpty – you know the story, right?

He was a fragile egg, sitting on the edge of a bridge and toppled off, cracking his shell.  All the kings horses and men couldn’t put him back together.

That’s how I have been most of my life.

Broken.

Many times I tried to put myself back together, to cover the wounds, to right the wrongs.

I failed.

I saw therapist after therapist.

I was still broken.

I became a wife and a mother and suddenly, I had to put myself together, but the glue wouldn’t hold.

I became UNGLUED.

The smallest things would set me off.  Explosion!

I was tired, irritated, angry, frustrated, still broken.  What was wrong with me?  Why was life so miserable?  I had a great husband, wonderful kids, and yet here I was, stuck in the darkness, sulking, ashamed, lost.

Several years have passed now since I gave my life to God.  Since then, I have seen tremendous change in my thoughts, my actions and reactions, my words, my feelings, my life.  I have gone from wanting to die to being thankful for every moment I am alive.

I have gone from feeling dead to being alive!

I am finally living!

Lysa’s book reminds me that I’m not completely there yet.  I still come unglued.  I still need to be molded and guided.  I still need a little glue to hold me together.  The glue comes from God’s word.  The more I soak myself in His word, the more I find myself secure and stable.  The more I learn to depend on Him and turn to Him in moments of despair, the more I find peace.

I have a long way to go but I know God is not finished with me.  He is working on my through Lysa and her book.  He is showing me and teaching me how to handle my explosions and how to deal better with the situations that bring out the wrong reactions in me.

I’m broken but God has the glue to fix me!

© The Imperfect Princess at theimperfectprincess.com

Unglued | Explosions

Are you one of those women who is very soft spoken with gentle words of encouragement pouring out 24/7?  Or are you one of those women who’s quick response often sounds like you’re battling for the next shouting champion?  I would fall in the latter category.

My kids can sure get loud, but they are no competition for drama mama when she gets angry!  I can out yell them any day and many days I do.  I’m not proud of that.

This weeks lesson for Melissa Taylor’s Online Bible Study on the book, Unglued, by Lysa Terkheurst, we are going over Chapter 5 which is titled, The Exploder.

I am an exploder.
I yell.
I shout.
I get angry.
I vent.
I blame others.
I make excuses.
I regret.
I carry shame.

1 Peter 5:8 says,  “Be self-controlled and alert.  Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”

When I first read that verse, I automatically thought of my kids.  They should be the ones with self-control and alertness because their mom is just waiting for a moment to devour them – to chew them up.  Their mom is a stick of dynamite with a short fuse, waiting for someone to light it – Explosion!

That’s not at all how their life is suppose to be and that’s not what God’s plans are for my life.  His plans are for me to learn to get a grip on things, to handle situations without exploding.

Instead of being the one to attack or explode, I am the very one who needs to turn to God.  During times of frustration, anger, fear and worry, keeping my eyes on Christ is exactly what I need to do.

Lysa says, “Do not check in with the screaming demands of the world before you exchange whispers with God.”

I have had the glorious gift of songs in my head for months now.  Nearly every morning when I wake up, God has blessed me with His words through songs I know.  It’s been one of the most amazing blessings in my daily routine.  It keeps me in His word.  It gives me a moment of time with Him before the demands of the world take over.  Sometimes it’s exactly what I need to encourage me to dig deeper into His word.

One of my favorite verses sums up Lysa’s quote perfectly.

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.  Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.  Psalm 143:8

Oh Lord, continue to bless me in the mornings with your promises of love and hope.  I do trust in you.  Guide me throughout my day and help me to choose carefully my reactions and words.  I am a work in progress and there is no progress without you.


© The Imperfect Princess at theimperfectprincess.com

Unglued?!

Do you ever feel like you’re coming unglued?

I know I have and all too often do.

One of my favorite authors, Lysa TerKeurst, talks all about it in her just recently released book, Unglued.

This week, I began Melissa Taylor’s online Bible study, along with 15,000 other ladies from around the world.  We’re all pumped about learning we’re not alone when it comes to being unglued.

Ironically, chapter ones title is “An Invitation to Imperfect Progress”.

How do you like that?  She used my favorite word…Imperfect!  Considering you guys already know I am the imperfect princess (and often unglued), this book is perfect for me!

So, onto the book.  While going through chapter one, I read this quote, reread it, then read it again.

“What is my problem?  Why can’t I seem to control my reactions?  I stuff.  I explode.  And I don’t know how to get a handle on this.  But God help me if I don’t get a handle on this.  I will destroy the relationships I value most and weave into my life permanent threads of short-temperedness, shame, fear, and frustration.  Is that what I really want?  Do I want my headstone to read, ‘Well, on the days she was nice, she was really nice.  But on the days she wasn’t, rest assured, hell hath no fury like the woman who lies beneath the ground right here’?”

When I read that, all I could think about was the day I’d just had, the screams I had blurted out at my children, the tears that poured down my face because I allowed myself to come so unglued.  I had that moment, you know the one!?  The moment when everything breaks loose, all the stuffing I’d been doing, all the hurt feelings and disrespect, the putting everyone else first, the wasted energy and unloved feelings, the attitudes, and everything else in my imperfect world that had been stuffed deep inside, all comes busting out.  Driving down the interstate like a mad woman, I yelled and turned into that monster mom we’ve talked about before.  My kids probably wondered if it was the end of the world and at that moment, I was ready to make good on it.

Then I hear, this sweet, quiet little voice from the only of the three that had somewhat obeyed, say, “It’s okay Mommy!  I’m sorry!”

Geezzzz, could she have made my heart sink any further?  Here was this not quite three year old taking the blame for my anger.  She was apologizing to me when she had done nothing wrong and I had done everything wrong.  She wasn’t even the one I was screaming at and yet she was trying to make me feel better.

Lysa goes on to say, “I know what it’s like to praise God one minute and the next minute yell and scream at my child…” 

That’s exactly what I had done.  I had the radio blaring with the top Christian hits on K-Love and while it played in the background, I drove in rage and anger while yelling over the music at the little people behind me.

“…and then to feel both the burden of my destructive behavior and the shame of my powerlessness to stop it.”

I came unglued.

Why do I do that?  
Why can’t I control my anger?
Why do I yell at the people I love most?
Why do I let things build up?
How do I change my reactions?

I pray that as I read through this book and participate in this study, those questions will be answered.  I’ll be posting occasionally to let you know how it’s going :)  Church ladies get ready – this study is coming to you in the spring!

If you haven’t had a chance to read Unglued, it’s definitely worth it!  You can read the first two chapters on Lysa’s Unglued book site.  Come back here and let me know what you think!

Stay tuned for more in the upcoming weeks as I work my way through this book and study!

© The Imperfect Princess at theimperfectprincess.com