↑ See the picture? Ever had one of those kind of days?
How do you handle things when something goes wrong? Does it depend on the day? The situation? Who’s with you? Or do you carry a similar response in any situation?
I ask because as Christians, we are often put into a category, one where standards are higher, room for failure is minimal and everything we do and say is used for or against us. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, however, the only perfect person to ever walk the earth was Jesus Christ himself. Even he dealt with problems, hurt and pain.
Do you feel like you are truly able to express things when you are having a bad day? Or do you feel you have to push your feelings aside and wear the “happy mask”?
I am fully aware that tomorrow might be better but I think sometimes, we try to help one another by saying things like, “Give it to God” or “In God’s time”. While we mean well, these don’t actually address the issue. Sometimes, we can go a bit further directing someone to a verse that fits the subject, a prayer or both. These may very well be just what we need and often times, soaking in God’s word has been the pill that fixed my problem at the moment.
Other times, I just want someone to hear what’s on my heart. I want someone willing to let me say it, even if it means I say it over and over until I’ve completely forgotten what I was saying. Sometimes it feels like what I need is just to have my feelings validated, to hear “That really stinks and I’m sorry you feel that way” or “Yes, I’d be upset too!” or maybe even “Sure, you have ever right to be angry!”
More often than not, I think we just don’t know how to respond so we fall on easy phrases. We depend on familiar words and overused lines.
Would it be so bad to dig deeper into each others heart and soul? Aren’t we worth the effort? The extra time?
Instead of saying, “tomorrow is a new day!”, why not validate each other by saying…
“Tell me more.”
“What’s really bothering you?”
“How are you feeling about that?”
“What do you want?”
I’m sure I’ve been the girl who’s used those common phrases but the thing is, I don’t want to be that person. I don’t want to be her because I know how it feels to stuff all the feelings down, to feel like it would be wrong to dredge up things, to feel anything, to express any anger or sadness.
I’m also the Christian that others look to for guidance, for hope, for something more so I’m already worried about the things I say and do and how they affect those around me. I’m already stuffing away some thoughts and feelings because I don’t want to offend or hurt someone else or because I know I should set a good example.
So today, I leave you with this…
We are all broken people. We all have things that bother us. We all have bad days. We all need someone, even if we don’t want to admit it. Sometimes, I just want to hear that it’s okay, to feel justified in my feelings. Sometimes I just need reassurance. Sometimes I just want to let my defenses down enough to cry, which is a really big struggle for me.
Being head over heels for Jesus Christ doesn’t make me perfect like him. It just makes me a girl who knows the standard Christian answers, who knows that God is the almighty and that yes, with him, I can get through anything, but also, a girl with real feelings, who might just need to borrow and ear or a shoulder sometime!
How about you?